What is a funeral?

According to Webster’s, the most trusted dictionary, a funeral is the observance held for a dead person, usually before burial or cremation.

²² And ye now therefore have sorrow; but I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice, and no one shall take your joy from you.

We get great lessons on the deceased by the people whom they impacted. Though I did not know my cousin Peter very well, I got to know him through  the kind words of those who knew him intimately. His daughter Debbie, son John and several of his granddaughters shared beautiful memories of Peter. Then came the open mic opportunity for others to share. In the same manner of  great respect, many spoke of how Peter redirected their lives by teaching them his work ethic.

Please remind me that I do not want an open mic at my service because sometimes too many acquaintances feel that they have something important to say. This was not the case for Peter’s service; those who did speak had words  that were short and sweet.

The Lathers

My father had a great impact on the maternal side of my family. He taught my uncle Gilbert his trade of lathing; Gilbert taught my cousin Peter the same trade. Peter handed down this construction career to his two sons. Two of my brothers followed our father’s lead in the construction industry. My brother’s son, Stephen, is now running their family construction business in the Coachella Valley.

When a man understands his role as the financial head of the household, it automatically  transfers to the sons in the family. Peter’s son John spoke on how this was instilled in him. My cousin was a manly man, the type who did not put up with much.  He spoke his mind, and if you were on the receiving end, whether he was right or wrong, he stuck to his opinion.

The Great Loss

Peter and his family suffered a great loss when Peter Jr. was killed in a motorcycle accident about eight years ago.  When you lose an adult child, it changes you. You either become bitter or you accept the fact that life is not promised until you grow old.

Several cousins mentioned that Peter changed with the loss of his son. This softened his heart, and it was evident at the service. To the sweet sound of wind chimes softly filling the air, Vanessa and Angela, two of his granddaughters, spoke so lovingly of their grandfather. When Alice, Peter’s ex-wife spoke, we all knew that there was a beautiful reconciliation between them. What a testament of love to their family.

The Lopez Clan

At times it is a sacrifice to attend a funeral service. I am close to Peter’s sister Connie and her daughter Cindy, out of respect for the family, it was important that I attend. Since I am, and forever will be, the President of the Lopez Clan (an inside family antic).  I made several phone calls to inform the family of the loss.

My mother comes from a family of nine, and many of her siblings had more than five children. So to say that I have many, many cousins is an understatement.  Thanks to technology, we are closer and more informed than ever before. Needless to say I do make it a point to keep in touch with my cousins more often; it’s one of my duties as president.

I knew this was going to be a long-day adventure, and Mike had agreed to take me to the service; but when I talked to my cousin Delia, she invited me to ride with her brother Leo and her son Paul. Leo had recently purchased an older vehicle and wanted drive to El Cajon. Aside from the strangest rattling noise, the old girl held up pretty well. Twice Paul, who was the designated driver, proved how fast the car maneuvered. Thank God for seat belts!

Two More Funerals

After a short battle with cancer, my cousin Rick’s 43-year-old son Ricky passed away. We bombarded heaven for a miracle, but it was not to be. Rick is one of the cousins who I keep in contact with, and to see him and his family go through this great loss is incomprehensibly sad. There are no words of comfort to bring them any understanding at this time. I silently stand in the gap for them and continue to ask God to comfort their broken hearts. I cannot imagine the pain of their great loss.

This past Saturday, my spiritual brother and dear friend  Robert was also called home to be with the Lord. Robert was part of our Skid Row homeless outreach. He faithfully walked the mean streets of Los Angeles with me to extend a meal and prayer to those who needed love. Robert was part of our lay ministry, and for years taught Bible study classes. His ministry reached so many lost souls. He had a great impact on the lives of so many. Robert had a special gift of quoting Scripture. This came to him naturally; he was basically a talking Bible. I marvel at how he gently and powerfully ministered. I will miss you, my brother in Christ!

When people are called home, it is not only time to say good-bye but to reflect on the lives of those who we have lost. In the natural we question why God would take someone like Ricky home. He was too young, he had a life ahead of him, we say. But ultimately it is God who makes the final decision. I know that something wonderful will come of Ricky’s death.

Death affects us all in a different way. Some will experience the loss of faith, while for others it increases their faith. But it’s how we come to terms and accept that it was God’s will that we can maneuver through the darkness of the loss. If we ask God to help us through these trials, everyday our burden will become lighter.

Believing the Word of God and fully understanding that we will be together with our loved ones is part of the saving grace we share as Christians.

My Prayer

Dear Lord, comfort the hearts of all who have lost loved ones. Surround them with sweet memories and allow them to cherish their precious moments together. Amen.

I had absolutely nothing to do with any of the planning, It was a concerted effort during family dinners as to which excursions we would take. I showed up and, surprisingly, it all worked out well. As a family we bonded.

The Ship

In 2019 several of my cousins and I took a weekend cruise into Ensenada, Baja Mexico. So I thought this cruise would be similar. It was not. I did not know what to expect on this massive monstrosity of a ship. We sailed with over 4,300 passengers and nearly 2,000 crew members.

Royal Caribbean’s Ovation of The Seas was built in Meyer Werft Shipyard in Papenberg, Germany. The Quantum-class ship is made of all metal. It first set sail in April 2014. Durning our summer months it cruises along the Alaskan coastlines,, from there is sails to Australia for excursions, which includes sites in New Zealand.

Sometime last year I watched a special on the volcanic eruption in New Zealand’s White Island. This was part of an excursion that Ovation of The Seas offered. 47 people were on the island when the volcano started to erupt; among those were 38 passengers and crew. The eruption killed 22 and injured 26. The ship remained docked for several more days and every passenger on board received a  refund. I had no idea that this was the same ship.

All The Amenities

We took advantage  of many of the amenities that the ship had to offer. To better familiarize ourselves, Sonja and I attended a short seminar about Juneau. We participated in a family trivia session and also took the class on how to fold napkins 10 different ways. I believe I got one down.  I played Bingo with Maddie, Jacob, Jenny and Sonja.  The boys played Pickle Ball and Ping pong and Will was in a basketball tournament, so on the days that we sailed we were kept pretty occupied.

Sonja made sure that we had reservations for all of our family dinners together. Two of these nights were “dress to impress” evenings. It was fun getting dressed up and posing for photos,  followed by dinner.  On some nights the meals were better than others. The lobster dinner was my favorite. After a few days we all had our different breakfast hangouts. Shamefully, I ate bacon and eggs daily with toast and hash browns. Needless to say I came beck with extra baggage wrapped around my waist, four pounds to be exact.

The Crew

How do you train every single crew member to be so kind? These people were exceptionally accommodating to all our needs. Even though our cabins were equipped with hair dryers, Sonja brought hers from home. She ended up knocking out the electricity for about 10 cabins on our floor. David, our housekeeper who is from India,  informed Sonja to hide the dryer because they were going to search her room and possibly fine her. We had adjoining rooms so the hair dryer was placed in Mikos and Jenny’s room.

The Excursions

After listening to the Juneau seminar,  all I wanted to do was eat crab legs. I was dressed for cold weather: an undershirt, topped with a turtleneck plus my raincoat. When I got off the boat the sun played me dirty. It was so hot that I had to purchase a t-shirt. I changed right outside the store and Mike graciously took my turtleneck along with the raincoat back on board. While the rest of the group took a nature hike, Mike and I strolled the streets of this quaint town.

Mikos instructed  us to meet him at the Russian Orthodox Church, but it was a hike up a steep hil.  By the time we arrived I was winded and needed to catch my breath. Then I discovered directly across the street the beautiful Co-Cathedral of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Jacob and I lit a candle and prayed for our loved ones.

This was going to be a full day because we had scheduled a salmon bake. I do not like salmon, so I ate ribs instead. By the time evening rolled around, it was cold. Sonja lent me an extra jacket she had in her backpack.  For the sake of those who do read this blog. I did not mention the numerous times I complained.

The following day was another adventure–Skagway.

Skagway 

We were going to need our passports for this adventure because part of this journey involved going across the Canadian border. This bus tour led us through  beautiful water falls and the suspension bridge. But the best part was seeing a bear in the wild! I can finally check that off my list.

Can someone please explain why in a town of 1,200 inhabitants there are six jewelry stores?   No doctors or dentists and forget about a hairdresser, but jewelry stores they have.

Sitka

On this day our family, excluding Mike and me, rented bikes and went on an adventure, but I saw it as a triathlon. There were two casualties: first Jenny fell over her handle bars, causing injury to the palms of her hands; then Sonja followed with a fall . It seem she got tangled up in her bike. Her foot and arm were very bruised. When they showed us the photos, Russ was carrying two bikes over some big boulders. In another picture all the boys were in a boat paddling to who knows where. When they met us at the bear habitat, they still had to ride back into town! Not us, we hopped on the bus.

While Mikos gorged on crab legs, and Mike on halibut, Russ and I had the best fish and chips made with fresh halibut. It was time to board the ship.

Entertainment

Aside from the demonic New Age show, the entertainment was excellent. Traumatized from the previous show, some of the family stayed behind for their production of Dreaming. Dreaming was as entertaining as any Broadway show in New York. The singing, dancing and the sets were amazing.

Goodbye, Alaska

By the time October rolls around,  75 percent of the stores in these villages will close for winter. Overall I did see a bear in the wild, but no whales or eagles; so we must return. Part Two will be described next week.

My Prayer

Thank You, Lord, for this wonderful trip with our family. despite all of our differences and personalities and many recited  Hail Mary’s we became a unit of love. Amen.