Every one of us has a mother. And as mothers, our role in life is to pray for our children and pour ourselves into nurturing them.
Not The Same
There’s a phrase that has never quite sat right: “I love all my children the same.” The truth is, loving children the same is simply not possible — because each one is uniquely and irreplaceably different.
From the moment God gifted us with our children, it was clear just how different they truly were. Our son is easygoing, laid-back, and steady. Our daughter is more complex — deeper in ways that required more of us. Because of that, the rules we set for her were a little more strict, not out of favoritism, but out of protection. She needed that structure, and honestly, it served her well. She is the most organized person I know — and trust me, she did not get that from me. Without bragging, our daughter is just a beautiful example of what a nurturing mother is meant to be.
Our son, on the other hand, had a natural gift for finding the edge of every boundary we set. We had to constantly stay on our toes and adapt as he grew. He kept us on our knees — and that was probably exactly where God wanted us.
Through every bump along the way, God’s hand was molding our son into the wonderful man he has become.
Neither of them was perfect. But then again, neither were we. What we never did was give up on discipline.
Parenting Our Children
As parents, we fought. We disagreed. We went back and forth more times than we can count. But eventually, we always found our way to a consensus — and the most important thing we learned was this: we had to be a united front. That unity was not just strategy. It was the foundation our children needed to stand on.
My Example
I thought of all that my mother had to go through as a single parent. She had seven children, and what she accomplished with us was an amazing task. My father was rarely around for most of my childhood. In the first five years of my parents’ marriage, they had five children — one each year!
By the time I came around, there was a three-year span, and when the youngest was born, another three years. I marvel when I think of how our mother raised us — how she planned our meals and washed mounds and mounds of clothes. There were no clothes dryers back then; we had clotheslines instead. My mother’s life was not easy, but we never knew we were lacking, because she taught us to appreciate what we had.
The Sacrifices
I was born with amblyopia in my right eye, and I can still remember my mother taking me on a Greyhound bus to see a specialist in San Diego, CA. When I was five years old, my mother arranged for me to have surgery, and she stayed at the hospital the entire time. I was prescribed special sunglasses to wear, but my brother accidentally sat on them the following week. The broken glasses were never replaced because it was too much of a hardship for my mother to return to San Diego.
Single Mothers
I think of all single mothers and what they must sacrifice to do what our mother did — especially single working mothers. They are the heroes of the world! Our mother was in her late thirties when our father checked out. She never dated because she understood her role as an example to us, especially to her daughters. She was decent in every sense and wanted us to follow suit.
The Fifth Commandment in the Bible states to “honor your father and your mother.” Some moms are not the greatest of mothers and are difficult to honor, let alone love. This is the only commandment that comes with a promise.
Honoring Your Mother
Why and how do you honor a flawed mother?
Every mother is human. Some never had a good role model themselves. Some were ill-equipped to love the way a mother should. But here is the truth — it does not matter what kind of background your mother came from, or how deeply she may have hurt you. God is not making a suggestion. He is giving a command: honor your mother.
The word honor means high respect and great esteem. At the very least, she gave you life. And for that alone, gratitude is owed. Even when the relationship is painful or strained, never stop trying. When you choose to honor your mother, you are not just obeying a commandment — you are learning one of the greatest values life has to offer. Because if you cannot learn to honor her, something in love itself will always be missing.
We all need to understand what love truly represents. There is nothing greater than a mother’s love for her child — and even a mother who is broken, difficult, or dysfunctional still deserves to be honored. God made this a commandment precisely because He knew parents would fall short. He knew it would not always be easy. He commanded it anyway.
Mother’s Day
This Mother’s Day was truly wonderful.
Mike made the most incredible prime rib — perfectly complemented by baked potatoes and green beans. Jenny brought her famous salad, and Sonja baked the most delicious lemon cake. But the best part of all was simply having the entire family together under one roof. Nothing gladdens a mother’s heart quite like peace in the family.
And I have to say — all the help cleaning up the kitchen afterward was its own kind of gift.
Prayer
After Mass, between catnaps, prayer carried me through the entire day. There was something beautiful about lifting the whole celebration up to the Lord and trusting Him with it. We had planned to eat early since everyone had tickets to see The Devil Wears Prada 2 later that evening. The movie was surprisingly entertaining — but the best part, without question, was simply being together.
My Prayer
Dear Lord, I pray for all mothers today. Help us to follow the example of the greatest role model we have ever been given — Mother Mary. Please bless every mother, especially those who are estranged from their children. Jesus, bring unity to all hurting families. Amen.
