Mothers Against Parties

Mikos and me
The Mikosmobile

When our son Mikos was a sophomore at Villa Park High School, I was part of an unpopular grassroots movement. Another mother and I formed a club called MAP, an acronym for Mothers Against Parties. Some of us moms knew that our boys were being exposed to alcohol at local parties, so we wanted to inform other parents of the parties that were being thrown with booze being served to kids.

Four of the party boys, Mark, Carter, Brad, and Mikos

Sheryl and I were the moms that spearheaded the club. Sheryl was unable to attend the first meeting, so I made sure to nominate her for president, and me as the vice-president. We made flyers and arranged for the other meetings. In the meantime, the word had spread about the new club at the high school. Mikos and Mark (Sheryl’s son) were being bombarded with questions about MAP.

Mark, Carter, and Me

We met with several interested parents, but they were skeptical of  the new club, so the few meetings that we had were pretty much a disaster. The goal was to form a network of parents, and as soon as we found out about a party, we would call parents to warn them. During this time parties were being given with the full knowledge of parents serving alcohol to minors. We were aware that at some parties an admission was being charged. I could not believe that parents were so irresponsible in allowing this in their homes. I would not be a part of this. Little did I know that our son was already in a pre-party-animal mode.

Sweet 16 party for Mikos. Aaron, Mark, Mikos, Carter, and Brad

Mikos was 15 years-old, which meant I was the taxi. Once Mikos and his friend Carter (our second son) needed a ride to a friend’s house. I drove them and dropped them off at the  house. As I made my way around the cul-de-sac, I noticed there was a party at the end of the street. Mikos and Carter were still in the front yard of the house when I drove by. I rolled down my window and yelled, “Don’t even think of going to that party!” For sure my son would respect this command, as after all I was the VP of MAP. Sonja was in the back seat of the car, and she would never miss a opportunity to rat out her older brother. She said, “You know they are going to the party!” Carter and Mikos not only went to the party, and that decoy house where I dropped them off  was that of a stranger. That is why they were still in the front yard when I drove by.

Soon the the short-lived club of MAP dissolved due to lack of interest. Both Mikos and Mark were the talk of Villa Park High School, and this just added to their popularity and more party invitations.

When Mikos turned 16, we bought him a car. The red Jetta came with personalized license plates “Mikos” and was also known as the Mikosmobile. It was not even two weeks later that he and Carter were traveling on the 91 Freeway, when a Highway Patrol officer pulled them over. Mikos got his first speeding ticket. It was not until just few days before his subsequent court appearance that he would share this information with us. I accompanied Mikos to court, and as we were standing in line, I asked to see the ticket. Mikos hesitated, but finally handed it to me. My son and his friend Carter were driving 90 miles per hour! As much as I wanted to scream, “What the hell were you thinking!” I held my tongue. I told Mikos to get his license out and to put it into his shirt pocket because the judge was going to take it from him. The judge gave Mikos two choices, guilty, or not guilty. Mikos answered not guilty. The judge said, “Young man, I commend you for your response but hand over your license.” This was sweet poetic justice and redemption for all that I went through with MAP. Of course I had to pay the price and become the taxi for the duration of Mikos’s suspended license.

I believe that all that we were put through in these teenage years made me become the Holy Roller that I am today, and I thank God for family therapy as well.  Mikos followed in my footsteps and is the VP of sales for a (very) large organization.

Proverbs 29:17 Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.

 

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Ten Days in China…Ten days with Grandma

Maddie 12, Cubby 5, Will 10, and Lucas 7

Train a child the way he should go, and when he is old he will he will not turn from it.  Proverbs 22:6

Two months ago, this talk started about China. Mikos and Jenny had been invited to visit Tsingtao Beer Brewery in Qingdao, China. This was a trip of a lifetime with all expenses paid, staying at five-star hotels, so how could I say no to watching Maddie and Will? In the meantime, another storm was brewing with Sonja and Russ planning a trip to Minnesota to celebrate Russ’s grandfather’s 90th birthday. These trips collided to form the perfect storm of babysitting. My grandchildren not only come with real luggage but they bring their dogs as well.

Our grandchildren are involved in way too many things. Maddie has play practice, Will has soccer practice, Maddie has soccer practice, Will has basketball practice, Lucas has soccer practice, Cubby has soccer practice, and all at different times, and thank God, different days.

Day One: I was looking for the brush to apply my eyeliner when Cubby came running into the bathroom, saying, “Father Leonard fell down! Father Leonard  fell down!” No sooner does Lucas come running in to contest all that Cubby said. Cubby was jumping up and down, his already big eyes getting bigger as he screamed again, “Father Leonard fell!” Lucas was yelling at the same time, wanting me to listen to what he had to say. In frustration to calm Cubby down, Lucas slapped him across the face and called him a liar. I wanted to laugh but I was confused. Father Leonard is a priest and dear friend of mine; what were these kids talking about? I told them both to calm down and one at a time, to tell me what happened. Again the screaming over each other started. I got up and said “Show me!” They ran ahead of me and opened the French doors to the back yard; there on the ground was our fountain, the statue of St. Francis of Assisi not Father Leonard, with all of the guilty kids pointing fingers at each other. There were no sibling alliances; it was every man for himself.  Just like the authors of the four Gospels, the kids all had their own version as to what happened. Only God knows the truth, and on judgement day the truth will be revealed, with God determining the guilty party. I thanked God no one was injured.

The resilient St. Francis

St. Francis suffered a blow to the head, leaving parts of his cerebellum in the shrubs.

This fountain weighs about 300 pounds, and Maddie and I had to put it together before Papa got home. This was difficult job because we had to connect the tubes for the water.  Lucas helped with the tubes while Will and Cubby nervously watched. With a lot of heave-hos, we did it! Once St. Francis was up and running, we noticed more damage, so I made those rug rats look for the parts that were missing.

Maddie price checking
Purchasing the school supplies

Hours passed and we had a project to complete. St. Norbert Parish’s, filling  backpacks was under way. I picked up two backpacks for us to fill. Maddie spearheaded the project by checking and comparing prices for school supplies, and found that Target had the best prices. We loaded up the SUV while Maddie separated the items to be purchased into two groups. Will and Lucas were team one and Maddie and Jacob team two. It did not take long before Will and Lucas started acting up and running around like wild boars. After a few threats, they sorta of calmed down. A woman and her daughter looked at us like we had the plague, Maddie overheard them say, “Here they come, let’s go another direction.” I so much wanted to explain that these kids were not my children, but they disappeared from my view.

We got home and completed the loving project. Lucas came to me later and asked, “Grandma, who’s going to pay us back for all the stuff we bought?” I reminded Lucas that we did this for Jesus and that He always pays us back in different ways. I told Lucas that a sweet lady, Doris from our  ministry blessed me with a generous amount of birthday money, and we used that blessing to fill the backpacks.

We waited several days to tell Papa about the fountain, as the kids  were terrified to face Mike. I can’t blame them, because  Mike gets upset about half-full bottles of water all over the house and is always yelling, “Is anyone watching those kids?” It is never a good time to break bad news but I had to tell Mike. He was his usual self, at first a little angry, then he thanked me for telling him.

Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.” Proverbs 20:11

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New York The Ciriza Way

Mike’s view from the Empire State Building

Our first trip to the Big Apple was in the early 80’s. As soon as we exited the taxi, there in broad daylight was a dead body in front of the entrance to our hotel. The police had just arrived and were investigating the matter. Before the man’s body was completely covered with a white sheet, I could not take my eyes off deceased person. To the New Yorkers, this was just another day and business as usual; no one seemed to really be overly concerned. This left a hard impression on me and it was difficult to shake off.

Mike and I settled in our room and could not wait to explore the sights. Not 10 minutes in our walk did we witness a crime. An attractive, well- dressed black woman grabbed a handbag from an innocent bystander and ran away with the purse in tow. Mike just looked at me and we both changed our direction. It was not that we did not want to get involved, it was that we were afraid. It did not take long to pick up the spirit of the detached New Yorkers.

We walked for miles until we finally reached Bloomingdale’s . This store is the original iconic heart of shopping in Manhattan, and all I  wanted was to be carrying a small, medium or large brown bag from Bloomingdale’s. Mike gave me a time to shop and told me to meet him at trendy restaurant called “Yellowfinger.” He pointed to the eatery, but I was too caught up in the overwhelming sights and sounds of my newly  discovered best friend Bloomingdale’s, so I was not paying attention. I wanted to experience every inch of Bloomingdale’s. I was about ready to try on some clothes when an older sophisticated sales clerk looked at me and said, “Honey, do you want to get mugged?”  “No,” I quickly answered. Then she took my handbag and gave me a tutorial on how to carry my purse. “Keep it in front of you at all times and whatever you do, not look up.” I still carry my handbag like this today.

Yellowfingers

It was time for me to meet Mike, but I came out another door on another avenue. No cell phones yet, so I reverted to panic. There are way too many exits to Bloomingdales and I was lost. I did not serve the Lord the with such fervor, so prayer was not even an afterthought. I did what came natural, cried and got really upset with Mike. After about an hour I finally made it to Yellowfingers. Poor Mike was so worried about my whereabouts, but I still have him and earful. I suffered from PMS back then (premenstrual symdome) but Mike referred to it as (pissed-off-at-Mike syndrome).

Mikos

It was in 1985 when we took Mikos and Sonja to New York for the first time. It was summertime. Mikos was about to enter junior high and Sonja was 9 years-old. Mikos was going through braces and in the stage of too cool to be seen with his parents.  I made an appointment for him to have his braces tightened the day before the trip. For the first few days it was as if I had intentionally asked the orthodontist to make the braces extra tight, and  Mikos held me accountable because he could not eat due the brackets being too constricting. I’d look at him and  just roll my eyes; through most of his adolescence that was my reaction, my voice being mostly in a screaming mode during these formative year but this helped with Mikos be becoming a fine young man.

Belle France Boutique

I heard of this boutique  “Belle France” on the chic side of town that I wanted to visit. The front door were kept locked so you needed to be buzzed in. This was a stuffy store with sales people trained in snobbery. We walked in and my eyes gravitated toward the sale rack. Mike was helping me pick out  dresses, then I picked a dress with a white collar that was two sizes too small. Why? I still don’t know, perhaps I was trying to impress my husband. I had a handful of dresses to try on, the dressing room was an ample size, and the full-length antique mirror added to the charm of the store, so I was happy.  I tried on the white collared dress and something went terribly wrong. I got stuck. I was hyperventilating and did my best to free my arms, but the dress was more like a straitjacket. My arms were contricted and any move would cause the dress to rip.  In the meantime the sales lady kept asking me to come out; Mike too was adding to this already stressful situation. I could not breathe and thought this was a terrible and embarrassing way to die. When I opened my eyes the white collar was all I could see, and  I felt as if it was strangling me. This struggle had lasted several minutes when I finally called for Sonja to come into the dressing room. At first she laughed at the sight, but I explained that I could not breathe. In Sonja’s words, ” Mommy this happens to my Barbie Dolls all the time; you just need to put your arms straight up and I will pull it off.” Out of the mouth of babes, what wisdom, she was right and I was freed from the white-collared dress.  By the time I was done,  I looked more like I had a wrestling match, because my hair was a mess and my face was flushed red. I developed a phobia for any white-collared clothing, and I get claustrophobic in dressing rooms. I did purchase a dress that day, but not one with a white collar.

Battery Park

From Battery Park, we could see the beautiful Twin Towers proudly displaying their grandeur. Who would ever in a million years have thought that one day these beautiful skyscrapers would be so violently  taken down? I had forgotten about this photograph; it is sad to think that my grandchildren will never experience this breathtaking view.

We did all the tourist stuff like a carriage ride through Central Park, a boat ride to the Statue of Liberty and a purchase of a Cabbage Patch Doll for Sonja, and we also attended a Mets game. Washington D.C. was our next stop.

Philippians 1:6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

I’m still evolving; thank God for that!

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