On The Road To Sainthood

I finally finished the book!

If you want to be a saint, long-suffering should be your middle name.

Ignatius

Ignatius loved his life. He was born into a noble family in northern Spain and thrived in the world of the royal court and military life. He loved chivalrous challenges — the honor, the glory, the fight.

Until it all came to an end.

At the Battle of Pamplona, his army was badly outnumbered. Most men would have walked away. Not Ignatius. He persuaded his commanding officer to stay and fight. It did not go well. A cannonball tore through both of his legs, shattering one completely.

Just like that, the life he loved was over.

But that cannonball did not just break his legs — it cracked open his heart. Lying flat on his back with nowhere to go and nothing to do, Ignatius picked up a book on the life of Christ and the saints. Something stirred in him that no battlefield ever had.

His suffering was not the end of his story. It was the beginning.

 

Saint Ignatius of Loyola
Saint Ignatius of Loyola

The Convalescing Soldier

Ignatius struggled during his recovery. He wanted to lose himself in tales of chivalry and romance, but the only books available were on the life of Christ and the saints. At first, it was not exactly what he had in mind.

But something happened.

The more he read, the more his heart shifted. A new desire began to replace the old ones. He wanted to do great things — not for a king, but for God. His conscience would not let him rest. He felt a burning need to do penance, to make things right, to go all the way to Jerusalem.

He spent years planning that trip to the Holy Land.

God had other plans.

The Jesuits

God knew exactly what He had in Ignatius. What started as a wounded soldier with a restless soul became something far greater. In 1540, Ignatius and a small band of devoted companions founded the Society of Jesus — the Jesuits. They became powerful instruments of Catholic renewal at one of the most turbulent moments in the history of the Church, carrying the faith to the far corners of the world.

The Calling

When the Lord calls, sometimes He needs to break your leg to get your attention.

This is exactly what happened to Saint Ignatius. He was, first and foremost, a soldier for Spain — and beyond that, a womanizer and a thoroughly worldly man. At the Battle of Pamplona against the French, his leg was so badly shattered that it had to be broken again and reset by surgeons.

But that only made things worse.

The bone protruded so much that it bothered him greatly. Men wore tights in those days, and a disfigured leg was simply not acceptable to a man like Ignatius. He ordered the doctors to break it again.

There was no anesthesia.

He did not flinch. He endured the procedure without so much as a cry. Ignatius already had a clear and intimate understanding of physical pain — and an iron will to match it. What he did not yet know was that God was already putting both to use.

St. Ignatius’ Apparitions

Throughout his spiritual life, Ignatius experienced many apparitions. Christ appeared to him repeatedly — consoling him, strengthening him, and reminding him he was not alone. This was not a man living in comfort. Ignatius depended on the charity of others, begging for alms just to survive. In Venice, he sustained himself by begging and sleeping on the steps of St. Mark’s Basilica.

St. Mark’s Square is one of the most visited places in the world. Tourists fill it every day without any idea that one of the greatest saints in the history of the Church once slept on those very steps.

The Enlightenment

On his way to pray at a small church outside of Manresa, Ignatius stopped and sat along the riverbank. What happened next is difficult to put into words — because it was not exactly a vision.

Sitting there, facing the river, his eyes of understanding simply opened.

He did not see anything extraordinary. He knew things. Spiritual things. Truths about God and faith and the interior life flooded into him with a clarity he had never experienced before. It was so overwhelming, so complete, that the entire world seemed new to him afterward.

Some moments change everything. That was one of them.

Jerusalem

Ignatius did make it to Jerusalem. Despite every obstacle thrown in his path, God gave him the desire of his heart.

In 1523, he boarded a pilgrim ship with almost nothing to his name — only hope. His intention was to stay in Jerusalem permanently, spending his days visiting the holy places where Christ had walked. But it was not to be. The provincial authorities made it clear: it was too dangerous for him to remain. Ignatius was sent away from the very place he had spent years longing to reach.

God’s plans and our plans rarely look the same.

Jesus’ Footprints

Before leaving the Holy Land, Ignatius had one final, burning desire — to return to the Mount of Olives. This is the sacred ground where our Lord ascended into heaven, leaving His very footprints behind before being taken up into the clouds. (Acts 1:9–12)

It is a place that leaves a mark on every pilgrim who visits it.

Having traveled to the Holy Land over twenty years with a lay group, the Chapel of the Ascension was never once missed. Staying at the Mount of Olives Hotel, it was often just a short walk to reach that holy ground. Nearby stands the Church of the Pater Noster, built on the place where our Lord taught His disciples the Our Father — a prayer the whole world now prays.

Ignatius stood there knowing he had to leave. He went anyway, one last time, just to be close to where Jesus had been.

That is what love does.

Ignatius’ Roommates

Imagine sharing a room with Francis Xavier and Peter Faber.

These three saints actually lived together as roommates — and all three became founding members of the Society of Jesus. Peter Faber came from Haute-Savoie, a region tucked into the French Alps in southeastern France, near Mont Blanc. Francis Xavier came from a castle in Navarre, Spain — a world away in background, but united in mission.

On August 15, 1534 — the Feast of the Assumption — Ignatius, Faber, and Xavier knelt alongside Diego Lainez, Alonso Salmeron, Nicolas Bobadilla, and Simão Rodrigues and pronounced their Jesuit vows together in Paris. Seven men. One calling. The Society of Jesus had begun.

It was not a coincidence that they chose Our Lady’s feast day to make their vows.

Education

Of all the religious orders in the Catholic Church, the Jesuits are known for having the longest and most demanding formation. Depending on the path, studies can range anywhere from eight years to as many of seventeen to twenty. The fruit of that commitment is visible everywhere.

Loyola University Chicago, Loyola University New Orleans, and Loyola Marymount University in Los Angeles are just a few of the institutions that bear this saint’s name — institutions built on the belief that faith and rigorous intellectual formation are not opposites, but partners.

Ignatius understood that to change the world, you had to form the minds that would lead it.

 

 

 

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On The Road to Damascus

Fr. John blessed our 54th anniversary

On January 25th we celebrate the conversion of Saint Paul.

My Conversion

The road to Damascus for me was not easily paved; it took many meandering turns until I arrived where God wanted me. Not being certain of the new direction brought me many questions. “Is this where You want me, Lord?” and, if so, “Give me a sign!” The sign was sitting right next to me (more on that later) but I still wanted more answers. You see, when I left the chat room of the Holy Catholic Church, no one in my family followed me.

Forcing my young children into this newly found road to Damascus came with a price. Mike would have nothing to do with it, not because he was so Catholic but because he felt that it took me away from our family. For years this path on the dusty road to finding who I was in Christ was about to take a dramatic turn. I was like Paul.

Our 2022 Sacramental marriage with Fr. Leonard officiating and Fr. John concelebrating

Bashing Catholics

With a Bible in my  hand and an arrogant spirit, I felt that Catholics needed a wake up call. After all, they prayed to saints and worshiped Mary. What were they thinking? I sharpened my arrows and placed them in my quiver, ready for battle because these poor Catholics needed salvation. I started the campaign, and from an imaginary soapbox warned my friends about the evil Catholic Church. And, just like Paul, I got knocked off my high horse and came back down to earth.

Two Women

Doing my due diligence to convert the world into my Protestant beliefs fell on deaf ears. Two of my dear friends,  unlike me, were richly catechized. They never questioned my growth, and I knew that they were praying for me.

The Sacrament of Confirmation

At one point my nephew wanted me to be his sponsor for the Sacrament of Confirmation. Of course I said, ” Yes.” But my friend told me that I could not sponsor him because I was not a practicing Catholic. She went as far as making an appointment with her parish priest to set me straight. I listened to the priest, but in my arrogance this information went in one ear and out the other. I made the travel arrangements to sponsor my nephew in New Orleans, but God intervened.

A Day Late

When I arrived at the airport my flight was scheduled for the following day, which meant that I would miss the Confirmation! I was a day late, and his brother was rightfully his sponsor.

Born Again

The road to Damascus was paved with much growth and my experience in the “Born Again” movement was well served. I attended Biola University (Bible Institute of Los Angeles)  and received a Bachelors degree in Science. Biola is a Christian university so when I attended in the 90’s no Catholics were allowed admittance.  So this paved the road to complete my education, giving God the glory for fulfilling yet another dream.

Now I understand and have compassion for those who are making their way to where God leads them. Realizing that we are not all going to fit in the same Christian box, I can rejoice  that together we belong to a strong family of God!

Saint Paul

Saint Paul was on his way to Damascus to destroy the Christians and everything they stood for. He was well equipped with all the proper paperwork to demand that the spread of Christianity stop. He was not going to stop there: he wanted all those who belonged to “The Way” to return to Jerusalem to be put to death.

As Paul entered Damascus, God led him to the home of a Christian man named Judas. The Lord spoke to Ananais, a Christian leader, and gave him instructions on how to deal with Paul.   All the Christians knew what Paul was about because his reputation preceded him. Our gracious Lord explains who Paul will become.

Three-Day Fast

For three days Paul did not eat or drink. Paul was listening to the inner voice of God telling him how he would change the course of Christianity. By the time the scales were removed from his eyes, he was totally transformed and ready to die for Christ.

Mike

On January 25th Mike and I celebrated our 54th wedding anniversary. I was 19 and he was 21 years old when we got married. One of the main purposes of God was to bring me back to the Catholic church so that Mike would be at my side. Every Sunday we worship at the 8:30 a.m. Mass at St. Norbert.

My Prayer

You have given Mike and me so many wonderful years together. At the twilight of our years, may we grow stronger in love for one another with You as our guide. Amen.

 

 

 

 

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Spiritual Depression

With Mary at my back, Paco and quiche always bings joy into my life

Depression comes in many forms.

Pity Party

In my late thirties some days I would wake up sad or, as the world would know it, “depressed.” My mind would activate and play some sad scenario over and over again. Years ago this condition was referred to as  premenstrual syndrome (PMS). This condition became my self-pity friend. Was everyone out to get me? Probably not, but it certainly felt like it. On a bad day even strangers were fair game because the depression would escalate to anger. A pity party followed because of the guilt.

Getting Help

I sought help, but my life took a positive turn only after I discovered a clinic specializing in PMS. I am a proponent of holistic alternatives, so this paved the road to the recovery I was seeking.  This medication was not FDA approved;  therefore my gynecologist was not in agreement with the treatment. The decision was a no brainer because the treatment was made with natural progesterone and there was a medical doctor to oversee the appointments.

Several months later all of the symptoms disappeared. This treatment stood the test of time and this clinic, Holly Anderson’s PMS Clinic, is still in operation in Arcadia, California, .

Modern Day Depression

As a result of the medication the depression was lifted. So now when it surfaces back into my life, I know how to fight it. But sometimes if I’m too tired, I give in to the sadness; my mind goes deeper into this negative thought pattern. By allowing these evil spirits in, something more sinister approaches the mindset – self-pity.

Self-Pity

At this point you are either going to do one of two things: you’re either go deeper into the abyss of depression or you’re going to snap out of it. This is the Devil’s favorite tool; he loves it when we are feeling sorry for ourselves. He amplifies the distress by reminding us of who, and why we were hurt by replaying the words or actions that were said about us.

The Devil wants to keep you in this unhealthy state of mind. Why? Because this is where the destructive dialogue takes place. The Devil will suggest that you go out to get a drink of alcohol or take some drugs to make you feel better. Once you’ve taken that evil advice, he can easily control you. People who are depressed and turn to substance abuse go deeper into this mental illness. Now Satan can and will control your thought pattern. So what is the antidote?

Getting Professional Help

Mental illness is real but help is always available. Seek professional help but be careful who you choose, because there are many therapists who are not aligned with God. I’m not saying that they would lead you astray, but wouldn’t you be better off with someone who can help guide you  to the the greatest healer of all? We turn to Jesus.

Remember that the Devil is lurking and waiting for you to stumble.

These evil spirits then invite other like spirits to keep you down. Familiar evil spirits are prevalent in the mind of the hurting who have no spiritual direction. This is why the Lord places people in our hearts for prayer.

Who gets attacked? When you are doing ministry work for the Lord, you get attacked. For example: if you go to Skid Row in Los Angeles and pray for addicted, homeless people, I can guarantee you that you will be subject to scrutiny by someone who will either start an argument or is simply upset with you for no apparent reason. This is a perfect scenario for Satan. First: you’ve entered into his territory because those poor, drug addicted, homeless people are right where he wants them. Second: the Devil will subconsciously enter into the mind of a loved one to attack you.

The Diabolical Plans

For years I experienced this after ministering to the homeless. It took me a while to make the connection that my loved ones were being used by Satan. They might not have not even realized that they were being used as instruments of discouragement. Satan wanted me to surrender by saying, “Every time I go to Skid Row I get attacked! Is it worth it?” For 20 years, once a month, this ministry continued.

This ministry came to an end only after the outbreak of  COVID.

All the work we do for the Kingdom of God is worth every effort! And though we may get attacked, the blessings outweigh the attacks when we see spiritual growth in those we are praying for.

Suffering

Do not waste your mental torments and spiritual battles;  instead offer then up for those who are truly suffering and battling for their lives. Suffering is a tool that teaches and strengthens us to become better human beings. How else can a person who has survived cancer minister to someone who is going through the same thing? Through suffering we develop spiritual muscles to fight the good fight.

Prayer

We all suffer from some type of discouragement, depression or sadness. When I feel it coming, I immediately start to pray. When prayer is not working, I sit in silence. Also listening to praise music brings  healing to my mind. We cannot allow the Enemy an open door to bring us down because when this happens we start to question and doubt God. Remember our Lord knows everything we are suffering through, and He will fight the battle with and for us.

We live in a world of so many uncertainties. So many people are angry and want revenge. Their spiritual guards are no longer their weapons; instead they use hatred. We serve a God of love, and in His world there is no room for hatred.

My Prayer

Dear Lord, bring us all into a place where we can experience Your true holiness. Unclutter our thoughts, and pour Your Holy Spirit over us. Remove all doubts and confusion, from our minds and replace them with peace. Amen.

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