Still Being Transformed

 

Born on the Feast

On August 6th, the Church celebrates the Feast of the Transfiguration of the Lord — the moment on Mount Tabor when Christ’s glory broke through His humanity and left the apostles breathless. What a joy, what a mystery, to have been born on that day.

And at 74, the transformation is still underway. Not finished. Not even close. Just continuing — the way grace always does, quietly and without fanfare, until one day you look in the mirror and realize something has shifted.

Weight Struggle

For as long as I can remember, I struggled with weight. I tried so many diets, joined groups — you name it, I did most of them. The problem was never a lack of trying. It was always the approach — and the wanting of immediate results. Learning that hard lesson took decades. But it finally paid off, and it all started with the lockdown.

Before we get into the story of the pandemic, I want to say plainly: I was convinced, early on, that COVID was going to touch all of us in some way. It did.

Lockdown

Mike and I were in our late sixties when the pandemic hit. By the government’s own math, we were already statistics waiting to happen. We weren’t allowed to visit our families — and that, more than anything, was the clincher for me.

I sat glued to the television looking for some scrap of solace in the middle of this epidemic. We were, in every real sense, living a kind of quiet hell inside our own home. The monotony was grinding. The sameness of each day was slowly breaking my spirit.

As a reminder — and it was a true reminder — I had been attending daily Mass. And then our governor closed the churches.

Without the Eucharist, both my body and my soul were in danger of losing hope entirely.

Model Seniors

We were model seniors. We stayed away from our grandchildren, away from family, away from everything. The fear that Dr. Fauci placed in our hearts was real — and all we wanted was to comply.

Seniors were given grave warnings about the vaccine. Mike didn’t hesitate. I, on the other hand, refused. My reason was not defiance. It was lived experience: I had already developed an autoimmune disorder from a flu shot, and I was not willing to repeat that.

The Flu Shot

In April of 2019, I was scheduled to travel to the Holy Land on a missionary trip. Mike wanted to make sure I was prepared, so — without giving it a second thought — the day before the trip I stopped into our local CVS and got a flu shot. I thought nothing more of it.

Symptoms

A few days into the trip, I felt a strange discomfort in my mouth. A perfectly ordinary tomato was causing a burning sensation I couldn’t explain. On closer inspection, my mouth was inflamed — covered in redness and a white substance. Being in a foreign country with a packed schedule, there was no practical way to see a doctor. The symptoms were uncomfortable, but there was little to be done.

Lichen Planus

The moment I returned home, a doctor’s visit delivered the news: it was lichen planus — an autoimmune inflammatory disease that can be triggered by infections, certain drugs, and vaccines. It did not stay confined to my mouth. For two years, lesions spread across my body. Two years of my life marked by that diagnosis, traced back to a routine stop at a pharmacy the day before a trip to the Holy Land.

For that reason, another flu shot has never been an option. And the COVID vaccine was out of the question. Mike would sometimes beg me to comply. But I knew what had happened once, and I was not willing to gamble again.

Weight Loss

 

Back to where this all began.

Three Ballerinas

There have been many foolish weight-loss choices in my life, but the one about the tea is unforgettable.

About ten years ago, I boarded a Southwest Airlines flight headed to New Orleans to visit my sister Jo. Mike wasn’t traveling with me that trip, so I settled into the window seat. A southern gentleman took the aisle. When the announcement came that the flight was full, a beautiful Filipino woman slipped into the middle seat beside me.

She was roughly my age — yet she looked absolutely fabulous. Was it genetics? A disciplined lifestyle? Or was she onto something I wasn’t? My curiosity was already building.

The southern gentleman introduced himself to us both, but my attention was fixed on this woman. He offered to order us cocktails. Normally, I’d have passed without a second thought — but I wanted an opening. A shared drink felt like the right setting to ask a stranger for her secret. We raised our glasses and toasted to a safe flight.

Then I went for it.

“How do you stay so slim?” I blurted out.

She let out the most adorable little giggle. “I drink tea — regularly,” she said.

Tea? Tea?” I repeated.

“Yes.”

Well. Pandora’s box was wide open now. I dove into my enormous handbag, fished out a pen, and prepared to write down the name of this miracle tea.

“What’s it called?”

“Oh, you can only find it at an Asian market,” she said — which was not the answer I was looking for.

Just give me the NAME already, I thought, barely containing myself.

“It’s called Three Ballerinas,” she finally answered.

I exhaled slowly. I could not wait to land.

As the plane touched down, I made the Sign of the Cross and thanked God for traveling mercies — and, quietly, for Filipino seatmates. I said my goodbyes to my new companions and nearly sprinted to find my sister. I was on a mission.

Jo wrapped me in her signature bear hug, and before we even reached the car, I was already talking a mile a minute about Three Ballerinas tea. My sweet sister didn’t miss a beat. “I know exactly where an Asian market is,” she said. “Let’s go right now.”

Could this trip have started any better?

Sure enough, right there among shelves of strangely named teas sat the boxes — stacked neatly, almost waiting for me.

“How many are you buying?” Jo asked.

“Four boxes,” I said. “Just in case I can’t find it at home.” (Online shopping wasn’t yet a thing.)

We were practically giddy. The moment we arrived at Jo’s house, we brewed our first pot. My nephew Nick, who was staying with her at the time, wanted in on the experiment too.

The trip was a short three-day weekend, and Jo had something planned for every day — but all I could think about was losing weight, and fast. We had the tea with dinner. We had it again with breakfast.

The Tea From Hell

Thank God Jo’s home was equipped with three bathrooms.

We had to stay put for the entire day. The tea was wreaking absolute havoc on our bowels — all three of us doubled over with stomach cramps, afraid to stray more than ten feet from a bathroom. And yet, in a moment of either bravery or sheer stubbornness, we had the tea again with our takeout lunch.

The side effects were swift and merciless. There would be no sightseeing. No adventures. No leaving the house. Just the three of us, humbled and cramping, completely at the mercy of Three Ballerinas.

The Filipino woman was an experienced tea drinker. She had earned that slim figure one measured cup at a time. We, on the other hand, had treated her quiet daily habit like a fire hose — blasting our bodies in pursuit of instant results. The tea wasn’t the problem. We were.

Nick, me and Jo

From that day forward, hot tea has been off the table entirely. The very thought of it is enough.

The Weight Lost

Since COVID, thirty pounds have come off — not through miracle teas, crash diets, or anything ordered in a moment of desperation at 30,000 feet. Through consistency. Through showing up, day after day: an extra half hour of walking, Pilates several times a week — which somehow became the turning point.

At a recent doctor’s visit, the news came that another ten pounds would be beneficial. If it happens organically, fine. But the routine stays the same — no shortcuts, no pressure, no forcing what the body needs to do in its own time.

There is also a doctor in the picture who seems to believe that every problem has a pharmaceutical solution. That particular prescription will not be filled.

My Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father,

Bless all of us Baby Boomers with good health — so that we may continue to pray, to serve, and to love those around us.

Amen.

 

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While You Were Sleeping: A Catholic Reflection On Dreams

Mikos’ baby book

The Dream

This morning I had an unusual dream.

For context: I kept baby albums for both of my children — but Sonja’s disappeared somewhere along the way. Mikos’ is safely tucked in a drawer. Sonja, always with a smile, insists I must not have loved her as much as her brother. Not finding that album after all these years of searching truly breaks my heart.

I found this announcement it Mikos’ baby book

In the dream, I was on a missionary trip, and we stopped in Chicago to do some shopping. There I found the bargain of a lifetime — a pair of $750 boots marked down to $130. I made the purchase quickly and wandered into the baby section of the department store. When I pulled open a display drawer, there it was, in living color: Sonja’s baby album.

The cover was identical to the real one — soft hues of yellow and blue — but this version had a baby on the cover who looked just like Sonja as an infant. The bargain of the century had become something far more precious than a pair of boots.

That boot deal was truly the stuff of dreams.

The Interpretation

Why did this dream come — and why was it so vivid?

Sometimes the things that have quietly slipped from our minds are brought back to the surface through a dream. God has a way of drawing our attention back to what matters, even in the night hours.

Why Chicago? Perhaps because that is the heart of the message: Sonja’s baby album is somewhere unexpected — hiding in plain sight, waiting to be found. The one place left to search is the proverbial attic, tucked away in a box alongside her Cabbage Patch Kids. When autumn arrives, the search begins again.

A side note: no technology existed at the time to reveal whether the child was a boy or a girl — that gift would be discovered only at birth.

God Still Speaks – And He uses Dreams

The Lord speaks to us in many ways — through Sacred Scripture, through dreams and visions, and by bringing others into our lives to help guide us. After much prayer, the Lord opened the door for this blog. He gave me a vivid dream about it, and in that dream, He told me to name it My Catholic Roots Are Showing. He even gave me instructions for the logo. When I woke up, I journaled everything with great excitement — but also with a real concern.

I prayed and questioned God: “How can I name it My Catholic Roots Are Showing when I have so many Protestant friends — and when my son is not serving You in the Catholic Church?” I waited on the Lord for an answer. The following night, I had the same dream again. That repetition was my confirmation: God was instructing me to use the name He had given.

Many people today are receiving dreams — some of them prophetic. A prophetic dream can be a confirmation of something that is about to happen, or it can serve as a warning, calling us to prepare spiritually and perhaps even change the course of what lies ahead.

A good friend’s daughter was away at college and had long struggled with substance abuse. My friend faithfully prayed for her wayward child without ceasing. Then one day, the Lord gave her a dream: she saw her daughter bursting out of a deep pit, her right hand stretched upward as she rose to the surface. That dream became a powerful reassurance — a sign that her prayers had been heard, and that her daughter’s freedom was on its way.

Joel 3:1 New American Bible (Revised Edition) (NABRE)

The Day of the Lord

It shall come to pass
    I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh.
Your sons and daughters will prophesy,
    your old men will dream dreams,
    your young men will see visions.

Warning Dreams

Years ago, Mike and I were looking to purchase a larger home. I found one not far from ours, contacted the realtor, and had Mike come with me to see it. It needed a great deal of work, but I was at peace with that — the yard was twice the size of our current home’s, and that sealed it for me. We made an offer and were ready to sign the paperwork, but the realtor had an emergency and was unable to meet with us.

That night, I had a dream in which I was overwhelmed with grief over having sold my house. I was crying in disbelief. The following day, we scheduled a second appointment to sign — but Mike was delayed at work, and we had to cancel again. That night, I had the exact same dream: the same sorrow, the same tears, the same feeling of deep remorse over losing our home.

When I woke up, I told Mike we could not go through with the purchase. It was a warning dream. We would later discover that the home’s previous owner had died by suicide in the master bedroom.

Prophetic Dreams

I dream regularly, so I keep a journal to record them. On January 16, 2007, I recorded this dream:

Mike was driving me to the airport — we were headed to Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) — but I told him my flight was actually out of Orange County, so we turned back. Along the way, we encountered groups of people dressed in loose clothing, walking freely on the freeway. They moved slowly, in groups of five or six, crossing in front of cars and causing accidents. I urged Mike to be careful not to hit them. Some had already been struck — their bodies were still on the freeway.

On August 29, 2009, I recorded another prophetic dream:

The United States was under attack. I watched as ships were bombed. I stood waiting for the Lord to speak through me in a prophetic word. I said, “I…” — and then waited — and the words came: “I, the Lord thy God, will bring disaster to this country.” These were the words given to me in the dream.

Both of these dreams came to light again as I went back through my dream journals.

Instructional Dreams

The Lord gives us instructions through dreams. When my husband Mike faces a challenge at work or cannot figure out how to fix something around the house, the Lord will often give him a dream showing him exactly how to move forward. In the same way, the Lord has used dreams to show me how to lead a Bible study or how to approach a difficult situation with a friend or family member.

Interpretation

Not all dreams speak the same language. Some are direct and to the point — like when Mike receives clear instruction on how to repair something. Others carry hidden meanings that require prayerful discernment. Colors and numbers, in particular, can carry deep spiritual significance.

I once had a dream in which I was retrieving my luggage from a baggage carousel, only to find that my suitcase had been opened and all of my clothing was spread across it for everyone to see. I was mortified as I rushed to gather everything. But every piece of clothing was in shades of purple. Purple is the color of royalty and kingship — and it is also the color of the robe placed on Jesus along the Via Dolorosa. Though my clothes were scattered and I felt exposed, the dream carried a message of transparency and integrity: there was nothing hidden, nothing to be ashamed of before God.

A word of caution: be careful about seeking interpretations from others. There are many who will mislead you. Bring your dreams to God first, and if you seek outside help, go only to someone who genuinely seeks the Lord for wisdom and discernment.

Numbers, too, carry meaning in dreams. In the warning dream I described earlier, I received the same dream twice. I did not act on the first — but the repetition was a confirmation. Two was not a coincidence; it was God underlining the message.

In the dream about the people walking on the freeway, their loose clothing suggests comfort and ease — a picture of those who move through life unbothered by boundaries or consequence. The groups of five and six point to the number eleven. In biblical numerology, eleven is associated with disorder and incompleteness — much like the chaos of filing for Chapter Eleven bankruptcy.

Acts 1:26 (NABRE) “Then they gave lots to them, and the lot fell upon Matthias, and he was counted with the eleven apostles.”

The Apostles were made complete with twelve — a number that mirrored the twelve tribes of Israel. Eleven was never considered whole.

Modern-Day Prophets

These are urgent times, and the Lord is still speaking through those who are attentive to His voice. Those looking for faithful Catholic voices on the End Times would do well to spend time with Dr. Taylor Marshall, who offers thoughtful content on topics such as the Three Days of Darkness, and with Mark Mallett and Daniel O’Connor of Queen of Peace Media, whose work on End Times prophecy is rooted in Sacred Scripture and approved Catholic private revelation.

God is waiting for us to return to Him. May we be found prepared for this spiritual battle.

God bless you.

 

 

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Don’t Sit Next To Me On A Plane

Worth revisiting — this story first took place in May 2004.

Fourteen Hours and a Divine Appointment

The Best-Laid Plans

Fourteen hours is a long time to be on a plane. The plan was to ask for an aisle seat at check-in, but the luggage was too heavy — at least on the way there. In a frantic rush to shift some things into a team member’s suitcase, the request slipped away entirely. As usual, the middle seat it was.

Neighbors by Design

To the left was Quinn, a young man traveling to Ukraine. To the right was a friendly man from Latvia whose name was never quite caught. Both strangers. Neither a coincidence.

A Missionary in the Middle Seat

After introducing myself as a missionary, Quinn introduced himself as an agnostic. The response came naturally: “Oh, you should not sit next to me.” Witnessing is second nature, and that day was no different. Quinn was gracious and polite as stories and photos from past missionary trips were shared. He was on his way to visit an orphanage and teach the children to play the ukulele — which led to only one honest response: “You are already doing God’s work — you just don’t realize it yet.” What a wonderful young man with a beautiful heart.

Dream Water and Tired Eyes

Eventually, fatigue won out. Quinn purchased something called Dream Water — described simply as the opposite of Red Bull — and drifted off to sleep.

image

Placebos, Greyhound Disasters, and a Green Shirt in Istanbul

Dream Water and a Gracious Skeptic

It fell to me to gently break the news that Dream Water was perhaps a placebo — Quinn agreed, but drank it anyway. Some battles are worth conceding. Quinn and I are now Facebook friends, and he continues to be used by God in a loving outreach to those young orphans.

The Greyhound Disaster

The gentleman to the right was doing his best, in broken English, to describe what can only be called a catastrophe. His dream vacation across America on a Greyhound bus had gone so badly that he was forced to rent a car halfway through the trip. The bus, he explained, was dirty, old, and not fit for any traveler. It was news to me that Greyhound even offered excursion packages to international visitors — let alone those coming all the way from Latvia.

Grand Canyons and Good Sense

He was deeply disappointed, and for a brief moment, the thought came to write a letter of complaint to Greyhound felt like the right move — before coming to good senses. A gentle suggestion was offered instead: most people drive to see the Grand Canyon. He received that quietly, with the look of a man who had already learned that lesson the hard way.

A Green Shirt in Istanbul

On the return trip, a short layover in Istanbul offered one more unexpected moment. Among millions of people passing through one of the world’s busiest crossroads, one young man stood out — wearing a green shirt, and without arms.

The Row That Was Never Mine

A Smirky Smile and a Settled Heart

This time, the aisle seat request was granted. The doors to the Boeing 777 were locked, and a smirky smile was exchanged with a friend named Jane. The whole row — empty. For one brief, glorious moment, it seemed like the flight home would be peaceful.

They Will Sit Here

Just as comfort set in, the young man in the green shirt arrived — the same one spotted among millions in the Istanbul terminal — accompanied by a companion. “We will sit here,” they said. The only honest response was a smile and the truth: “Okay, but you just ruined my trip home.” They laughed, sat down, and what followed was one of the best conversations of the journey.

A Refugee, a Reunion, and a Hug With the Eyes

The young man without arms is a refugee from Afghanistan, being escorted by a United Nations representative to Oregon. The moment he sat down, something passed between us that needed no words — a hug with the eyes. He was warm, friendly, and full of light.

Born That Way

Curiosity led to a gentle question: had he lost his arms in the war? He smiled and said he was born that way. Even his UN companion had not known — and was quietly surprised to find out.

The Aisle Seat, the Big Toe, and a Prodigal Son

A Reasonable Hesitation

When the food cart began making its way down the aisle, the UN representative kindly asked if the window seat could be taken instead. The hesitation was real — no, no, staying put felt right — but then he mentioned there was an aisle seat just a few rows back. A glance revealed a very handsome man sitting next to his equally beautiful girlfriend. The first instinct? “That guy is too big — that is not going to work for me.”

The Big Toe That Changed Everything

Then it hit like a ton of bricks. This young man eats with his feet. The concern was not elbows — it was knees. One glance confirmed it: his big toe was already navigating the monitor with ease. The decision was immediate. “I will move back.” Everyone was happy.

Joe, His Girlfriend, and an Old Wound

The next seat brought Joe and his girlfriend. After settling in and explaining the situation, the conversation opened naturally — and the witnessing began. The story of an encounter with a demon-possessed girl came up, and that got their attention immediately.

Daily Mass Parents and a Prodigal Heart

Joe shared that his parents were devout Catholics who attended daily Mass. He, however, was angry at the Church and stated plainly that he would never return. The response was equally plain: his parents are praying for him, and God answers the prayers of faithful parents. He and his girlfriend were gracious throughout — though there is a fair chance the conversation eventually put them both to sleep.

Every Seed Has a Season

The Harvest Belongs to God

Every person encountered on that journey received a seed. That much is certain. The planting was the assignment — the harvest belongs to God.

The Seeds Sown

To Quinn — a seed of servanthood for God.

To the young man without arms — a seed of welcome to America.

To his UN companion — a seed of love.

To Joe and his girlfriend — a seed that was already planted and simply needed watering.

 

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