How to Play the Cable Game

When you’re a Blogger, your business is on the streets. We need a new roof, so we decided to research getting solar paneling as well. No, we did not take a cold call from our landline; Mike is really doing his homework in exploring our options until we feel comfortable. Our current cable company came with an unsightly satellite dish, Mike asked me to inquire about going wireless in hopes of getting rid of the satellite dish. I procrastinated for several weeks, until Mike confronted me and asked if I had any information on the wireless cable company.

I asked our daughter Sonja for her advice, and she told me, “Mom, you need to research online, and do not call because the cable companies are notorious for adding more than you need.” My reply was, “I’m not stupid!”

I did the online thing, and then the next step on their webpage was to call the company. I fell deep into the cable trap and got all tangled up in their offers. I explained the universal complaint, that we no longer wanted to pay the exorbitant amount, and that we needed the satellite dish removed from our roof.

For the next three hours, the conversation went to the Philippines, Atlanta, and back to the Philippines. Every single time someone got on the line, the first thing that came out of their mouths was, “Thank you for your loyal service, I am so sorry you are having trouble,” or “I understand your concern,” or “We are here to help.” Finally, I felt comfortable enough that I had secured a great deal, saving over half of what I was paying, plus the removal of the satellite dish.

Before I hung up, I asked the foreign representative, what channels I had. I was instructed to go online for the information. All that came up were kid’s shows, and religious programs (I love them), but other than that, I was stripped of mostly everything else.

Another phone call, and another three hours. After all the revisions, the savings were minimal. To add to this misery, every time I called, I had to get Mike on the phone so that he could give them permission for me to make the changes. So finally we were set, and the cable company was scheduled to come out later that week. In the meantime Mike canceled the original service for that day of the new service.

The cable man came later that week, and the first thing that came out of his mouth was, “This order was so confusing, I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do.”The first thing I asked him was, “You’re going to remove the dish, right?” His reply was “No! we never do that!” The kind cable man walked around the perimeter of our house and went into every room, including the attic. Then he asked me, “Why are you changing companies?” I said, “Because we’re paying way too much money.”

I don’t really know what happened next, but either the cable guy thought the job was going to take too long, or he felt compassion for my plight. He shared with me that if I changed the services to my name, as a new customer, the price change would be a lot less, and the change reflected on my new bill. When I heard this, I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. With the cable guy standing behind me, I called the company and changed everything to my name. But it was not that easy, it took a long time, and I had to get Mike involved again .

After canceling the second service, I had to reinstate everything in my name and schedule for them to come out. Another two hours with a foreigner, with the heaviest accent, I honestly could not tell if it was a male or female, so I made the call and kept referring to the person as Ma’am. After about an hour into the conversation with the transaction almost complete, she put me on hold. Then another stranger picked up the call. “Can I help you?” I cannot explain what came out of my mouth, but it started with me screaming, “LOOK, I HAVE BEEN ON THE PHONE WITH YOU GUYS FOR DAYS! PLEASE DO NOT APOLOGIZE! DO NOT SAY YOU UNDERSTAND! DO NOT REMIND ME OF WHAT A LOYAL CUSTOMER I AM! JUST TAKE CARE OF MY PROBLEM! I WANT A RESOLUTION!” I knew I was being recorded, and at this point, all of the Jesus that was left in me went out the window…I did the unthinkable and dropped the proverbial F-bomb. I abruptly hung up the phone and called another provider. I felt really convicted and regretted using foul language, so I asked God to forgive me. As much as I wanted to apologize to that person, it was impossible.

This was the weekend of the Masters and Game Of Thrones (Mike’s favorite programs), but not for us. No Hallmark for me, no EWTN either, just Mike and our elusive cat Prudie.

The new cable people were scheduled to set up the service at 3 PM on Monday. We were excited to finally get all of new stuff, with loads of channels. We waited, and waited until around 7:30 PM. Mike came downstairs to inform me that there were two mysterious-looking trucks parked in front of our home. I honestly thought we were about to get robbed. The door bell rang, and a man with a plain shirt said that he was from the cable company. Mike had to tell me to calm down, when I asked, “Do you work in the dark?” “No,” said the man. “Well then why are you here?” I asked. Mike told me he would handle it and for me to go away. He got in a bigger fight with them and asked them to leave. We were back at square one.

The following day I left for Israel, and left Mike to take care of this mess. I had changed everything to my name, and I did not leave Mike the password. Mike called me while I was in Jerusalem and I just happened to remember the password. After that day my phone went missing, and poor Mike was left with dealing with another incompetent cable company.

As far as I am concerned, either all cable companies are overwhelmed, or controlled by demonic forces seeking to destroy our lives. I will never change companies again!

When I returned from Israel just one thing was left for the cable company to complete, our landline. The young man that came that fateful morning was kind and filled with knowledge. I asked him if he attended church. These questions always get me into trouble, but it’s my manner of making Jesus small talk. He told me that his mother attended Catholic school but was no longer involved in the church. With great boldness the Holy Spirit fell on me as I told him that it was no accident that he came to service my home. I then shared with him that he would be coming back to serve the Lord with great power. I went on to say that he would get confirmation from his mother, saying that she too would announce that she would be going back to her faith. I took a deep breath and said a prayer that this was a message from the Lord. I continue to pray for him.

If this entire cable ordeal was to get the young man back to serving God, it was all worthwhile…one soul at a time.

My landline rings about 10 times a day, “Hello, Lynda, you told us to call you last year, we are working on your neighbor’s home and are a family owned- business, blah, blah, blah ” My reply, “Please take me off your call list!” Don’t judge us, we are old school and still believe we need a landline. I use it to find my cell phone regularly.

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